Things That Are Not Overrated

Last weekend, nearly 7 years into my marriage, I went on my honeymoon. Now, don't get too jealous, it was not a traditional honeymoon. There was no tropical scenery, there was no cabana on the beach. There were no long walks hand-in-hand in the sand. This was an unconventional honeymoon in every sense. The most unconventional part of this excursion was the fact that my husband was not really with me for the majority of the trip. He was sequestered in our hotel room, studying for the board exam we went to Dallas, Texas for him to take. We arrived on Friday early in the afternoon and I was on my own until his test was completed on Sunday afternoon. Don't get me wrong, I really couldn't have cared less. I was free. I had no children; no one to take care of except myself, and that is all the vacation I needed.

I went running, shopping, and out to eat by myself. I took naps and read some chic-lit. Complete selfishness. I ate high-calorie foods and drank alcoholic beverages in the middle of the day. It was blissful. The day before we were set to return home to Indiana, my husband completed his test and was ready to join the already in-progress honeymoon. Ironically enough, that was Valentine's Day. We went to a museum and out to eat at a very grown-up restaurant. (You know, the kind where there is no kids menu.) It was wonderful. We talked and laughed and got to know each other as married adults, rather than parents. Despite the fact that we love them, we did not really talk about our children(during that meal). We again realized that we have so much in common and had a lot of other things to discuss. Fun things. Plans for the future. Most notably, our next adults-only excursion.

The following day, following a 12 noon check-out, we had more than seven hours to entertain ourselves. We walked a mile in the cold Dallas sunshine to hang at a bookstore and then see a movie. We chose "It's Complicated" mostly because we both love Alec Baldwin and because there was not much else. The movie was hilarious. We laughed out loud--repeatedly. I'm not kidding. It is really funny. The point of this however, is that one specific quote from Meryl Streep's character (Jane) struck me. A hard-working divorcee with 3 children, she had not spent a lot of time enjoying herself for many years. While on a date with the character played by Steve Martin (Adam), Jane exclaims, "Fun is not overrated!!" This struck me because, although I am not a hard working divorcee with 3 children, Jason and I have not had quite enough time in the past 8 years to have fun. Don't get me wrong, we have some fun. The fact is, we haven't been dedicated to insisting that fun is part of our budget, calendar or daily agenda. We have, of course, made plenty of time for cleaning, working and making sure our kids have baths every other night. My counter tops are sanitized twice daily and the playroom is picked up every night. Laundry is folded and put away, my floor is generally crumb-free. The previously noted quote reminded me that fun is more important than all of this cleanliness and routine, and that it is time to schedule some. I do not have the luxury of spur of the moment fun, as I have 3 children. I do, however have the option to make fun more of a priority in my marriage and in the lives of my kids. Next adults-only trip: Vegas. Who's in?