Eamon Turns Two and is Pretty Much a Boy

The day after tomorrow, my son will turn 2. Without question, he brought something into my life that was absolutely missing prior to his birth. He really has been a lot of fun to raise and I am just as smitten with him as he is with me. That baby knew who his mama was immediately and has been so attached from the start. He prefers his mama; his daddy is a close second. He is a charmer and a Romeo and I am still surprised when he busts his moves out and uses them on ladies at the doctor's office or the mall. Those dimples and curls are difficult to ignore.

Often, you will hear parents say that their son is "all boy." I would say my son is "pretty much a boy." You will not find my son paying any attention to sports on TV or out in the yard playing with a ball or a car. I mean, you might; it would just be rare. He's more of your "into everything" kind of boy. He is interested in how things work. He likes to play with doors and locks and loves to push buttons. He can climb any structure in our home. I guess that in these respects, he is "all boy." However, the dynamic of having 2 older sisters and a mom who stays at home have most certainly taken their toll on my poor son. We have no doubt robbed him of some masculinity with all of the pink objects and make believe princess stories. We certainly have not discouraged boy-type enterprises. We have trucks and cars and balls. Regardless, it seems like my son would choose a dance party over a choo-choo train; trying on shoes over a pretend sword fight.

Recently, I have noticed that my son is quite the caretaker when it comes to his sisters. He absolutely adores Sawyer. That is not to say that he doesn't fancy Madeline as well. He does. He just prefers Sawyer. They spend all day together and I am beginning to notice that Sawyer is clearly calling all of the shots. In the past week, I have seen my poor son scoot Sawyer in at the table on at least 10 occasions. He will get her a drink of water on command. He brings her blankie (dee-dee) to her when she is upset. He sits by her as she cries. He puts his arm around her to comfort her. He finds her her shoes when it is time to leave the house. He is, without a doubt her personal servant. Yesterday when she spilled yogurt, he got up to get her a towel. I let Sawyer know that encouraging Eamon to wait on her would be frowned upon. She cleaned up her own mess. Shortly thereafter, she spilled her water and ice. He cleaned up all of the pieces of ice and wiped up the water. Seriously.

On another note, my son has a bit of a shoe issue. In the last couple of weeks, when I tell him to get his shoes on- he puts Cinderella dress up high heels on. And walks to the bus stop. In a very stable fashion. With the proudest of looks on his face. It is hysterical. Of course, I have no problem with my son exploring the various sides of his personality but, just as it is not acceptable to wear dress up shoes to the mall for my daughters- it is not acceptable for my son. And he is quite angry about these types of restrictions. He doesn't care what clothes he wears. He just wants his high heels. They are blue, by the way.

As I think about this tender-hearted little boy, I have to wonder about the dynamics of our family. I'm sure that having 2 older sisters has an effect on a little boy. Then I start to wonder about DNA. My husband is also a bit of a tender heart. He cried at Patch Adams. The story is infamous among his dental school buddies. Then I wonder how much his behavior toward his sisters models Jason's behavior toward me. Today, a friend who is a nanny down the street brought her young charge to a play date at our house. She commented on how attached Eamon is to me and how he appears to be "the sensitive type." I am always surprised to find that my son is the sensitive one. This is not to say that the girls are not sensitive. They are sensitive little drama queens in every way. But Eamon is sensitive and caring. With this degree of sensitivity, I predict that some day Eamon will make a great husband and friend. Heaven knows that he is already a doting brother and more endearing a son than I could have ever imagined.

Sawyer Turns 4 (and is a ton of fun)

Yesterday, Sawyer turned 4. I wasn't sure this day would arrive. I have threatened, more times than I can count to return her to the hospital she came from. To trade her in for a less exhausting model. I think this frequent comment is the reason that Madeline is so adept at recognizing sarcasm. Originally, she would cry when I would say such things. Now she understands that sometimes Sawyer can be, um...spirited and we giggle about "returning" her.

Sawyer has not been our easiest child. Let's be honest. She has been for the majority of her time on the planet- our difficult child. She started crying when she exited the womb and did not stop. FOR 6 MONTHS. She had colic and reflux and a generally irritable disposition. At 6 months, she grew out of colic and spent the next 6 months being a good baby before she started the "terrible 12 months." Then she had the "terrible 18 months", followed by the "terrible two's" and the "terrible two and a half's". And then the "terrible 3's." You get the picture. Sawyer is spirited. She requires a different set of parenting strategies and a more hands-on approach. She is not Madeline and that took a while to understand. Nonetheless, for the past several months, Sawyer has been a true delight. She is energetic, imaginative, bright and friendly. She plays well with others. She loves her Mama like crazy and she is just plain fun to be around. She has entered a phase where it has all come together for her. She can express her feelings and even deal with her emotions on a level that I did not think possible. She can relate to kids younger and older than herself. She can charm the pants off people. She has charisma. It just took a while for her (and her parents) to figure out where and how she could flourish.

Having said all of this, I want to take some responsibility for Sawyer's spiritedness. I think Jason and I have just gotten to the point where we really understand what Sawyer needs. She has taught us to slow down, listen up and actively participate. She is in no way a black and white kid. She is all shades of gray. Parenting Sawyer has taken me to places, both good and bad that I did not know existed. Luckily, I feel like I have come out the other side with a better understanding of Sawyer and of myself. She is a fascinating little girl and I am so lucky to have had the chance to be her Mama.

Recently at a friend's house, we met a family who we had not come into contact with previously. This lovely friend has a pool and our kids were swimming together. The mother in this previously unknown family commented about Sawyer, saying, "She's a go getter. I bet there's never a dull moment." This woman pegged my little girl. Her next remark was, "It will be interesting to see who she becomes." I agree. I'm watching. I can't wait. I love you so much Sawyer. You have truly made my life a better, stronger place to be and I am so grateful for your presence.

Transitions

I am watching it happen. Summer is ending. Both girls have gone back to school and I have been given the gift of 3 afternoons per week to complete all of the glamorous tasks that I am called to do. But before I start bragging about organizing closets and sweeping out the garage, I want to take a moment to write about how difficult it must be to transition from summer back into being a student (or mom with a schedule to keep).

I would like for my kids to just go back to school and resign themselves to the fact that they are expected to take responsibility for various things, behave like decent members of society and make me proud while they are not in my presence. However, since my kids are human, they are having a bit of a struggle getting used to their new routines. I am trying to be understanding where this transition is concerned. Consider for a moment going back to school from a child's perspective: You have been having the time of your life for the past 3 months, living in a neighborhood PACKED with kids your age. You have been on vacation, had family visits, stayed up late, ate s'mores at bonfires and reveled in the love of those close to you. You have been swimming, have had fireworks shows and lit sparklers, been to the zoo, to a water park and have had too many playdates to count. AND THEN BOOM!!! You wake up one morning (much earlier than has been expected for the past several months) and you are expected to get on a bus and work all day, often in a room full of people that you don't know, with a teacher who seems to expect ALOT out of you. When you finally arrive home from school, you are expected to do homework (what?), practice piano (or whatever extracurricular said child is involved it), shower/bathe, clean your room and read. All before 8 or 8:30 when you have to go to bed. Not much of your day includes fun. It cannot be easy to go from almost non-stop fun to responsibility. Especially when you're 7. Or 4. Or 35.

Along with my children, I am watching the sun set on our summer with a sad, yet full heart. I can see my back yard changing back from a magical forest into y dry grass and trees- leaves dangling and ready to fall. I can see the drum and guitar fashioned from household castoffs, yet perfect for Madeline's "band", turning back into an old oatmeal canister and shoebox. I look outside in the evening and instead of being greeted with soaking wet children screaming in delight, it is silent on Gala Drive. It is almost safe to put the beach towels and goggles away until the special occasion to swim presents itself in the coming, colder months.

I'm not sure who is grieving the most over the loss of summer. However much I appreciate time to attend to long overdue household tasks, I am constantly reminded that my kids are not "all mine" anymore. I have to share them with teachers and friends. It will not be long before my children are grown up and I do not have them to dote on and enjoy during those warm summer months. We will all transition to this new routine in time. We will all be patient and eventually we'll get used to this new school year where we all have a new set of roles and responsibilities. The good news is that at the end of the responsibility and routine lies another summer on Gala Dr. And for that- I am grateful.