Our Trumie D is a very easy going baby. He is without question, the easiest of all of our children. He does not expect a whole lot of attention. He has a very even temperament. I'm pretty surprised about his easy going demeanor. I didn't really think a Chihuahua (me) and a Jack Russell (Jason) could create a laid back person but hence, it has happened. Except on the day when we chose to go out to eat at a "fancy" restaurant. All day, he had been a bit cranky and I'm sure it had something to do with the fact that the kid is dragged from one end of town to the other, so that I can drop off and pick up his siblings at every camp and activity under the sun.
Regardless, we went. And we went early. At 5:30, you generally only see senior citizens at restaurants around here. This time it was The DeWitts and the white hairs. We were taken to our table following a mandatory bathroom break for all potty trained children, and everyone was looking in tip top form. The kids proceeded to color their children's menus and talk about their cuisine choices. Jason and I perused the adult menu for appropriate choices and ordered drinks for the family. Trumie was a bit crabby but nothing that a baby toy and a pacifier in his car seat couldn't take care of. Until he really started crying. The disapproving stares of the seniors increased. I remained calm and tried to access my sense of humor. Truman's daddy unbelted him from the 5 point restraint and took him into his arms cradle style, in an attempt to comfort him. And then I saw the reason that he was crying.
Because I refuse to do any more work than absolutely necessary, my darling infant son does not wear anything except a onesie and a diaper to leave the house. Even when we're being fancy. Well, the 4 days of not pooping had come to an end. Furiously. Truman had bright gold baby poop oozing from his diaper, onto his onesie and subsequently onto Jason's finely pressed work shirt. My look of horror prompted Jason to pull Trumie away from his body and look down. The looks of disapproval from all of the perfect parents around me hit an all time high as I grabbed by son, gave my husband some baby wipes and rushed to the bathroom. Truman had had a total assplosion. Poop up the front and back and out the sides. As he received a sponge bath in the dark fancy bathroom, I could hear footsteps quickly approaching. The girls, because they are "helpful" had left their poop covered Daddy and were now standing in the restroom, watching the spectacle. I cleaned the boy up and all 4 of us headed back to our table. The older couple to our right had clearly never had any parenting mishaps and were therefore compelled to stare at us. To which I responded, "At least you get dinner AND a show!" At that point, they must have remembered some tiny mistake that they had made as parents and suddenly became more understanding by saying, "Oh, we had kids, too!" I couldn't see Eamon's face at this point because he was laying in his chair with his feet in the air while Jason continued to wipe his shirt AND pants which were both apparently mired in shit. The happy ending is that Jason looked at me and began to laugh. Sense of humor? Check.
While Jason headed to the restroom to finish cleaning the poop off his body, I informed the waiter that is was his birthday. I then added that I never would have brought 4 children to his restaurant unless it were a special occasion. He rewarded our antics with free dessert (delicious) for all. All in all, it was not a horrible outing. The fact is, if we never take our children anywhere, they will never learn proper behavior for various situations. The pain and work of it all is worth the effort. Hopefully, they will be confident when ordering for themselves and will be using the correct silverware when I am not there to guide them. And hopefully they will see the humor in difficult situations as well.
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